Here's book I would like to own

This is an interesting read and I admit that I would quite like a copy, although I imagine that I would find it of limited application. I do not have a servant although I guess that I could just have to be extremely rude to shop assistants instead. Then they can go home and vent their anger through spousal abuse I suppose, or string up a cat.
Which, incidentally, was almost a matter of concern at my flat. One of the ever growing family of pet cats disappeared for a reasonable period of time. We wondered if something had befallen it - in my case I wondered if that something was a family with a lifetime supply of Jimbos. Oh well, it has turned up again for our sins, and it may yet strike it lucky on the staircase. The lightbulb blew so this is a golden opportunity for a black feline to trip me up and eat like a king for weeks.

I was actually looking for the video article on the Russian president's pecs

But I found this, which is just as trashy, but not as funny. Enjoy.